Monday, August 4, 2008

Shower and a Siesta

On Saturday I co-hosted a shower for my cousin's wife, Whitney. She is due to have her baby on September 4th. I provided the cake, punch, napkins, cups, plates. I just bought the items I thought I would have wanted if I were having a shower. As you can tell from the pictures, she is having a boy and I thought "Sweet Prince" was so cute! My friend Brooklyn helped me save a ton of money and made and decorated the cake. She did a fabulous job and the cake tasted delicious.

I went shopping for the baby gift on Thursday and I had the hardest time. I am very happy for my cousin and his family but at the same time my heart hurts and yearns for the experience myself. I loved looking at the outfits and baby items but at one point I had to walk out of the baby section and come back. I thought I was going to cry right in the middle of Wal-Mart!! How crazy is that?! It is a very hard, frustrating feeling to have. You are happy for others but hurt for yourself at the same time!! Right when you think you have adjusted to your life's path something happens that throws you back! I so wanted Bryan to come to the shower with me. I knew it would be hard. But I didn't even dare ask him. My mother-in-law sent a gift but didn't come. When Whitney opened the gift Donna made I got tears in my eyes and had to keep my head down so no one would see me cry! I was physically and emotionally worn out by Saturday night! I nearly called a dear blogging friend to ask her to pray but I thought she would think I was crazy, psycho friend so I didn't. But God was there and I made it through. I do covet your prayers. I think because I have been so busy, I'm tired. And when I'm tired, my emotions are fragile! Can anyone relate?

Overall though I enjoyed the weekend. I saw my aunt and uncle and their family and I got to spend some sweet time with my 18 year old cousin Alyssa. We are trying to persuade her to come to OK for college (she lives in TX). We do try to step back and encourage her to pray about it and tell her it is only a decision that she can make with God. She has such a sweet soft spirit. And her younger brother, Shane, is just a great kid as well. They rode with us to eat Saturday night and Bryan and I loved to listen to him talk. He is such an even mix of his older brothers.

Here are some pictures of the shower weekend! Enjoy everyone!

These are the 2 onesies and bottle drying rack I bought for little Jesse. The camo onesie reads "Major Cute". Eric is in the Army and I thought that was appropriate.

We had a girls night out on Friday night. Whitney (Jesse's mom), her mother-in-law/my aunt, Alyssa my cousin, and my mom all went out to eat at Johnny Carino's the night before the shower. It was fun. Yes, Alyssa and I do have on the same shirts!!! Is that too immature? I loved it!! Bryan thought I was crazy!

Here is the set up at the shower. I used the wonderful Kelly Stamps punch recipe. Everyone loved it!!! I was so proud!!! Thank you Kelly for the recipe you posted!! The punch bowl was Bryan's grandmother's. I felt honored to get to use it.

Whitney with her shower hostesses

This is the little sweater Bryan's mom made for them. I thought it was absolutely adorable and the blanket to match is on Whitney's lap. I yearn for the day when Donna can make something for her own grandchild.

My aunt made this baby quilt. I thought it was absolutely adorable and she has told me she would make me one when we get our child and I know what nursery theme I am doing.

Alyssa and I after the shower! We wanted to re-create a pose we took 3 years ago.

My boy cousins and I at Cracker Barrel Saturday night. They are so sweet to us.

I had to put this picture in as it reflects how I felt once Saturday was over and I knew I only had 3 more commitments left for Sunday and Monday night!! Rest is just around the corner!!


Heather said...

Oh, sweetie!! You could have called any of your blogging friends, including me! I would have prayed, prayed, prayed for you! You are the sweetest person, Julie, and I HATE to see you hurting. No one would ever think you were psycho...Even in matchy shirts. Because we're women, and we get that matchy is cute ;) I love you, friend!!

Caroline said...

Julie, you are speaking so straight to my heart right now that I am having to hold myself together. My emotions have been all over the place the last 2 days, for other reasons, but the feelings are the same. the longing is the same......this is a verse for from HIM.."Jesus said to them, 'Come away by yourselves to a remote place and rest a while". make 6.31"

I love you friend and hope that you get some time to rest. That we would both remember that our Fathers plans our way better than ours....even when it hurts to much now......we must stay the course. love you

Jessica and Eddie said...

I can relate to your feeling. My little brother and his wife are expecting their first child. I am happy for them but it still hurts. I do understand how you feel. I am glad you were able to make it thru and enjoy the weekend.

Faith said...

Julie, I know the hurt and feel it myself too...I am so sorry that this weekend was hard. It just breaks my heart. I am praying that you would be able to rest your body and that God would bring peace to your heart as well.
Please email me anytime you need to vent or talk or whatever! I am here =)
Hugs, Faith

Kelly said...

Julie - I am so sorry. My heart just breaks for you and I pray for you constantly. I know exactly how you feel. I can't tell you how many times I nearly broke down in Wal-Mart when it seemed like all I could run into were pregnant women and babies. You know I'm the shower queen and sometimes I had to put on a really brave front to go to all of those showers and smile when it was sooo hard.
I want so badly for you to experience the joy of being a mother and I KNOW it will be your turn soo and you will get to have a wonderful shower and I am going to get you all kinds of cute things! Your faith and kindness always show through and I know it's hard to be discouraged.
Know that I am lifting you up EVERY day!

Kelly said...

And I'm glad you made the punch and liked it!

Megan L Hutchings said...

Ditto on what Heather could have called any of us at anytime ;)!!!

I completely understand where you are coming from! Sometimes the more exhausted I am the more I cry...darn hormones!

Web & I went to church with our friends this weekend and the main message he was relaying was...PRAY ALWAYS BUT DO NOT GET DISCOURAGED!

I can only imagine your sadness but I have faith He will see you through!

ocean mommy said...

Julie! You can call me anytime. I can completely relate to this. Just a few months after my first miscarriage, I help give a baby shower for an unmarried family member who was having twins. It was the hardest thing, and we went through another loss before we held our first daughter. And YES! My emotions were all over the place. I held it together (sort of) until I got into my car and then I cried all the way home.

I'm praying for you and your husband.

Anticipating Him with you!

Jenna said...

Julie, I am praying for you and am so sorry that you had a rough weekend. I cannot begin to know what you are going through, but I know that God is going to give you more than you can ever imagine! I also know that even though we hold that promise in our hearts, it doesn't always take away the sting away in our moments of despair. I pray God will draw you close to him in those moments and help make them few and far between.

I am thinking of you and praying for you! Love, Jenna

Heather said...

Julie- sweet girl! I am such a similar place right now. I feel like such a horrible person because I am happy for my friends who are pregnant, but at the same time, sad and waiting for my baby to come. It is hard to "put on the front" as Kelly said. And honestly, I think God understands and wants us to just be real. (Think about when Hannah bared her soul to God and she was so upset that everyone thought she was drunk...except God. He met her there and gave her peace.) Maybe not sobbing and crying at every shower, but I DO think we are free to be honest when things like that are hard for us.
I am praying so hard for you and your miracle. God has a plan, and it is the best. Not just good, the BEST.
You can vent to me anytime!

Melissa said...

Julie, I hope you found some kind of peace through God. I am sure that is sooo hard to go through!! I just hope I can have an ounce of "your" strength when I go through trials. You are such a great example! I am definitely praying for you!!!

valerie said...

You did a great job with the shower. The punch looks delicious.
I'd love the recipe.
I echo what the others have said. You are the sweetest person and so giving. I know your day will come and I can't wait to be a part of that special time.
You can call me anytime too! I'm keeping you in my prayers. Thank you for your honesty and for sharing with us.
Love you,

Anonymous said...

Julie,my heart hurts so for you! You are in my toughts and prayers every day all day long. I was watching you at the shower (in which you did a great job as usual) and wanted tho reach out to you and protect you from the hurt, but didn't know exactly how and for that I apologize. I so wanted Saturday to be you baby shower. God has a very special baby for you and Bryan that so needs only the love that the two of you can give! Love and Prayers!!!

Candy said...

praying now for you and Bryan. :)

Megan said...

Julie, I am catching up on all my blogs and just read this. I am praying for you - and from what I read many others are also. What a great network to have! I cannot begin to understand what this feeling feels like, but please know that I am praying for you.
Where would your cousin go to college if she came to OK?

Vicki Sears said...

Julie- You and Bryan are so precious to me. My heart hurts for you. I can't empathize with you, but I sympathize with you in many ways. I am so glad that God was there for you in ways that none of us could be. You can always call anytime. Know you are loved with Jesus' perfect love!

Anonymous said...

I have totally been there MANY times in the past 6 years. Please don't hesistate to call or email me for prayer or encouragement. I know this road your down all too well. God is faithful, I can promise you that and His timing is perfect!!!

Praying for you.....

MiMi said...

Julie, I know this must have been a very difficult time for you and I am sorry that you have had to experience this hurt. As you know, my precious daughter, Faith, is dealing with these same struggles and I am praying for both of you.

I am so encouraged by all the wonderful blogging friends that you have and I know that you have some real prayer warriors praying for you and your husband.

Nothing is impossible for God! He is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think!

Alana said...

That may be the cutest cake I've ever seen!