Very Nice to Meet You!!

Saturday, January 8th, marks the 1 year anniversary of when God introduced us to our forever daughter!

January 8, 2010

January 7, 2011

My heart has just raced with joy and excitement all week long as I have thought back on that day. It has been a wonderful year!

We have a picture with Gracie's case worker that was taken just outside the NICU at 2:47 p.m.! It is a little fuzzy but this picture is just priceless to me. We had a wonderful case worker. You can see the time clearly in the original picture.
I remember signing my name for security reasons on Gracie's sign in sheet (her name was different then). I remember seeing her birth mother's name. She visited Gracie the 3 days she was in the hospital after giving birth. I remember taking my jewelry off and leaving it with Bryan's mom. I remember washing my hands and arms in the big steel sink just inside the NICU. I remember thinking "This is it! This is it!" During those moments of meeting Gracie and throughout the entire day, I felt like I was floating above myself watching me go through all these events. It is just so hard to describe. There was much to be done from signing papers, to making doctors appointments, to meeting multiple case workers, to picking up the diaper bag at home, to installing the car seat!


The hall and walk to her room seemed so long! I remember we walked nearly the entire length of the hall and then turned right into her room. She was the second "bed" from the door nearest the window. As we drew closer my heart squeezed tighter and tighter. We just wanted to see her.

Oh! She was precious! I play it over and over in my mind sometimes. I remember being awestruck at the first sight of her. We had no idea what to expect. We just knew she was Caucasian Hispanic and weighed around 5 pounds. She was so tiny! She was swaddled so tightly we could only see her face, hands, & hair! Oh, what hair! I remember thinking "Yes! She has hair." She was just so much more than we could have imagined! Although she was born early, she was perfect in every way.

She never liked having her hands swaddled. Several times during those first moments she would raise her hands. We called her our Hallelujah Baby! I would sing to her..."Your love is amazing, steady and unchanging, your love is a mountain firm beneath my feet. Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah! Your love is amazing!" I was so giddy, I never could remember the other parts of this song while we were in the hospital.

She was so lite! I was not nervous at all to hold her, which surprised me just a little. I would have thought her prematurity (she was born 3 months premature) would have made me too nervous to hold her. But not so! I wanted to hold her right away (and I did), but I just kept feeling she would slip right out of my arms!I had a tingling sensation too and this odd taste in my mouth (I think it was just the excitement)! I did get to hold her right away and I even got to feed her. She did still have a tube just for a back up (she got that removed within 2-3 hours of us getting to the hospital). But praise God, she was able to eat on her own when we met her.

I could not believe I was holding a child that we were 75% certain (at the time) would be ours. I saw God so clearly on this day. HE had made her just for us. HE knew her when she was in her mother's womb! HE protected her for us! HE knew in 2007 and 2008 she was coming for us! I saw the end of one journey and the beginning of another great journey beginning! God is amazing! God is sovereign!
I remember seeing the absolute love, adoration, protectiveness, and possessiveness in Bryan's eyes! He is an amazing father! He was so gentle and spoke so softly to her. He seemed so comfortable with her in his arms. I totally fell in love with Bryan all over again!

I remember thinking "So this is what husbands and wives feel when they have their baby!"

I remember the nurse showing me how to feed her, how to hold the bottle to make sure she keeps breathing! I remember trying to watch her color and watch her nose flex. I remember praying to myself..."Lord please help me! She's dark complicated and I can't see the change in skin tone. Help me!"
I was a smiggin' nervous to feed her but we had monitors for us and they boosted our confidence. I remember the nurses encouragement.

I remember hearing my father-in-law walking down the hall to come into the room to meet his granddaughter for the first time. His tennis shoe was making a noise as he walked into the room. I remember seeing his frame fill the doorway.

Shortly after we met her, held her, and fed her ourselves one time, Gracie was moved to a step down room in another part of the NICU. She would stay there 2 1/2 more days. I think a big reason was for us to get more comfortable with her and to make sure she could continue to eat on her own. She was also monitored for breathing, oxygen levels, and body temperature. She's a strong girl! She was born at 27 weeks gestation and was only on the ventilator 1 1/2 days!

I got to stay in the room with Gracie 24/7. I remember the click of the door when Bryan left. I just walked to Gracie's crib and stared!! It was me and her!! She ate every 3 hours and I was suppose to sleep in between. I had a twin bed but how in the world I ask you could I have slept when I had my baby in that room! It wasn't that she cried. She never was a big crier in the hospital. I couldn't sleep because I had waited a long time for this day! My heart, head, and stomach was racing!!


I remember the phone calls, emails, and text messages from our friends and family on this day and through the day we brought Gracie home. My friend Brooklyn was my personal assistant! She did so much for Bryan, Gracie, and I. She ran around town on January 8th gathering things we had not yet purchased because we were not anticipating a placement so soon. She bought gender specific items. She brought us a car seat cover, blankets, outfits, and bows to the hospital.

I remember having such a surreal feeling when she visited me...she a mother, visiting me now a mother in the hospital. I will always remember the squeal over the phone when I told her we had a placement call. She walked every step with us through this day. We even went over to her house prior to going to the hospital so she could help Bryan install the car seat. And she was expecting at the time!
I remember where I was standing at in the Ada hospital (where my Granny was in the hospital) when I told my friend Kristine we were going to Children's because we had a placement call. I remember her soft sweet voice say "Oh, Julie!" These two friends as well as several others were so committed to Bryan and I. We have felt loved so much. It is an honor to have our friends. They truly are more than just friends. They are our brothers and sisters!



I have spent the past year enjoying this wonderful creation God has entrusted to us. Many times I have thought of blogging but I just can't quite find the right words. At times, I just cry with joy.


There are so many verses I have read in the past year that I have felt communicated my heart. One is 1 Chronicles 16:8-12, 23-25. It is David's Song of Thanks.



"Oh give thanks to the Lord; call upon his name; make known his deeds among the peoples!Sing to him; sing praises to him; tell of all his wondrous works! Glory in his holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice! Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually! Remember the wondrous works that he has done, his miracles and the judgments he uttered. Sing to the Lord, all the earth! Tell of his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous works among all the peoples! For great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and he is to be held in aw above all gods."

Psalm 145:3-7

"Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised, and his greatness in unsearchable. One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts. On the glorious splendor of your majesty, and on your wondrous works, I will meditate. They shall speak of the might of your awesome deeds, and I will declare your greatness. They shall pour forth the fame of your abundant goodness and shall sing aloud of your righteousness."

Carrots...Good for the Eyes

We had a great weekend. This is what I found on Sunday afternoon...

Gracie had her 6 month check up Monday May 24th and received her shots!!

I was by myself on this round so I didn't even try to get a picture. She was absolutely happy the entire time and then BAM!!! The shots came!!

She now weighs 12 lbs 9.5 oz.

She is 23 inches long.

Her head is 16 1/4 inches.

She is now in the 5th percentile in weight!! Yea!!! That may seem low to you, but we are just glad she finally made it onto the growth chart!! Her height still has not made it onto the chart.

Our doctor suggested we begin Gracie on some baby food...starting with veggies. So on Monday night we put her chair together and Bryan had the honors. I think I was too nervous to try. She was a little fussy beforehand because of her shots. Plus she never liked the cereal we tried in previous weeks. I just wasn't sure if she would take to baby food.

Initially it was touch and go...

But overall, we feel like she did very well her first time.

What's In A Name

I have spent the past month and a half absolutely enjoying life as a wife and mommy! The time has flown by!! I find myself saying that several times a week. Our little princess has changed so much in just the past 2-3 weeks! We love her more and more each day!! And we are just mesmerized by her more and more each day!!

Some may already know her name from my original post on face book. But I later removed it for security reasons. Today, on her 6 month birthday, I wanted to post her name and why we chose it.

When her adoption is complete her name will be:

Gracie Faith ______ Haskins

She will have two middle names. The last one is the first name her birth mother gave her when she was born in November. Although parent rights have been terminated, we are still waiting to post that detail as well as her actual birth date.

We debated on changing her name. We considered keeping her name but shortening it to something else. We wanted to have a name that was reflective of Bryan & I and one that would display who our Lord is and what He has done in our lives as well as hers! We wanted her name to be a testimony. We do not have salvation from an eternal hell were it not for God's grace and His gift of His son. Her name isn't just about our journey to have a family, her name is about all things in life on our walk with God. God gives us grace, undeserving favor, every day of our lives.

Gracie's name is reflective of our journey to get her into our home. We would not have Gracie were it not for God's grace. There is absolutely nothing Bryan and I could have done in our power to receive such a precious child. God gave us Gracie because He is gracious. We could not have worked out the details and timing like God has. We are undeserving of every gift He gives us. When you face infertility or the loss of a child, it takes a lot of faith to walk through to the other side. It takes faith to walk through the unknown. Ours was not always perfect. At times, our hope and our faith seemed so small.

We want Gracie to know how important faith is. For it is by GRACE through FAITH we are saved!! I'm excited for the time to come when Gracie realizes her name is reflective of God's plan for salvation. I pray everyday for Gracie to grow in faith, love of scripture, and her understanding and realization for repentance and a Saviour.

So each time we say her name, look at her, hear a song about God's Grace...His AMAZING GRACE, I am reminded both of the beautiful daughter we have and the Grace of God throughout every activity and provision in my life.

We are still waiting for our side of the adoption paperwork which we hope to receive within the next few weeks. It is our hope all legalities are done by her 1st birthday!

Gracie is 6 months old this week!

I completely missed posting on her 5 month birthday, but I did get a picture.

She has changed so much since her 4 month birthday. And a lot of that change has come just within the past 2-3 weeks. We think she is on a growth spurt.

At 6 months:

*Gracie began sleeping through the night April 29th. She has only woke up during the night on 3 nights. Last night though, she woke up every hour!!

*Gracie weighed 12 lbs on May 3rd and was 23 3/4 in long.

*Gracie wears a size 1 diaper.

*She has now begun to wear size 3 months clothes.

*Her eating schedule has changed back down to every 3 - 3.5 hours and she takes about a 5 oz bottle at each feeding.

*We have tried rice cereal 4 times now, but she doesn't seem to like it or take it well from the spoon.

*Her first laugh was on Monday, May 3rd.

*Her daddy goes into her room every morning before he gets ready for work and she greets him with a huge smile! She is a happy baby in the mornings.

*Gracie loves to watch people in a crowd. She is very alert. She loves to interact.

*She has begun to bend her legs up and down, like she is jumping, when someone holds her in their lap.

*She loves to have her hands in her mouth. We often hear her smacking!

*This morning she began bringing her hands up to her bottle and she held her bottle briefly by herself for about 4 seconds today.

*Gracie took her first long distance trip to Ft. Worth, Texas in April for Daddy's PE exam.

*She has slowly, very slowly, moved from despising tummy time to tolerating about 5-7 minutes.

*She loves the clown a lady made at Nawna's church and that helps with her tummy time.

*She loves to stretch and kick in her bed. She slams her legs and arms down. We think she loves the thud sound. She still moves all over her bed at night.

*Gracie has rubbed a lot of her hair off on the back of her head and the crown. We think it is from moving so much in her bed. I have found her hair on her bumper pads!!

*Gracie has begun to spend some supervised time in her bouncer. She is learning to hold toys in her hands. She is also realizing items with texture.

*Gracie holds her head up quite well. She has begun to raise her head up when she is sitting in the swing and laying on her play mat.

*She sits in her bumbo chair very well now.

*Gracie squeals and makes the sound of "aaahhh" and "eeeeee." She will "talk" to me when I stare right at her and make an "oooo" sound.

*She loves to have someone help her use her hands to hit the table top.

*Gracie begins to laugh when we use her hands to pat our cheeks.

*On May 10th, Gracie had her first experience of Oklahoma severe weather when a tornado touched down approximately 1 - 1.5 miles from our house. She and I went into the closet...all during a feeding time and very humid weather!

After school, our friends, Ava, Stella, and Boston came by to have cupcakes to celebrate Gracie's 1/2 birthday!

Mother's Day 2010

I had a wonderful first Mother's Day. I had to be pulled out of Sunday School for the first time to go console Gracie! I loved it though. I felt so needed! I just held her close and rocked her! She quit crying almost as soon as I began to hold her and talk to her!! And the fact that she did that on Mother's Day was just fitting. She also spit up all on her new white sweater! :)

She had a little melt down last Sunday as well and I was called out of Sunday School. I'm wondering if this may become a habit. :)

Easter 2010

Our family has experienced one of the most memorable Resurrection Celebrations weekends! It is in part to having a wonderful blessing from God with our little girl, but the services we attended were just amazing! I wish all of you could have been with me to experience them and worship our Savior and King!

The three of us attended the Good Friday service at our church, FBC Newcastle. The worship leader, choir, and pastor led out in a Tenebrae service and we took the Lord's Supper as a congregation. The songs and drama truly caused a person to think on the cross, the sacrifice, our sinful selves, and God's mercy. It was amazing and really helped to honestly lead me to worship God. I am so thankful for those who worked so hard and gave up so much time so that I could experience it. The Good Friday service left me in anticipation for the services on Sunday.

Before we left for Good Friday Service

Bryan isn't in the picture because he just about got out of his truck and right into the car so we could get to church on time.

We had a nice Saturday at home, enjoying beautiful weather and working in our yard. There was even enough time for me to get all our clothes prepared and laid out for Sunday morning. I had a great Saturday. And thankfully, we were all dressed, picture taken, and on time Sunday morning!!

Here's a shot of my two favorite people while I worked on getting the timer on the camera ready:

I love it!! It was kind of an indication of how the morning was going. Little Bit didn't realize it was Easter Sunday and I needed a little time to get ready myself. Plus, she didn't really want to be in a dress. She prefers her pjs! She was a little fussy! We warned the nursery workers. And you'll never guess....she was perfect for them!! It is fun to watch Little Bit's personality slowly develop.

Our First Easter as a Family of 3!

My mom made this year's Easter dress for Little Bit. It is kind of a wild print but I loved the colors. I'm glad my mom was able to make her dress. Mom has been very giving to us and we loved going over to her house for "fittings."

This picture just makes me smile every time I look at it!

We have borrowed Nathan's Bumbo chair to see how she likes it. We did purchase one on Friday but I got a different color than I had intended for her and need to take it back and exchange it.

I'm looking forward to reading about your Resurrection Celebration Weekend!

What We've Been Doin'

I love cough medicine!! I have had a head/chest (it keeps bouncing back and forth) cold this week and I'm so grateful for whomever created the medicine to clear up the congestion and soothe my airways!! I've just been focused on taking care of Little Bit and resting when I can so I've not had much computer time!

Here's a catch up:

Last Tuesday was an exciting day in our household. It was the DVD release of one of the best movies ever!!

In honor of the movie, Bryan (although he didn't know it at the time but went on my instructions) picked up Taco Bell for dinner that evening. Little Bit even watched part of the movie with us before she went out for the night.

I love the movie Blindside and think every family should see it. It is a great movie to open one's eyes to the huge need of foster parenting and mentoring. What we give up, could save some child from the potential of a horrible future.

We've gone out and about a few times last week, but we have also tried to stay at home more and establish a morning routine. We love to read!

Excuse the frizzy hair! This was pre-flat iron time! Bryan took this and did not know the rules about non-frizzy hair in pictures.

Little Bit loves the book "God Knows All About Me" and I also read out of this illustrated book of Bible Stories each morning. It is fascinating to us to watch her eyes just light up and open wide once I begin reading the book. It makes me think she is recognizing the pictures...I don't know.

This same day we went to the doctor's office for her 4 month check up and shots. Bryan took off the entire day to be with us and go to the doctor's.

On Friday night, Little Bit went with me to my Bunco group. I play with a great group of ladies who are so supportive and encouraging to Bryan and I. It was nice to have her with me, but I'm pretty certain she will not be going again. I think she was a little distraction.

Miss Sharon

Miss Carla

Bryan's parents came up on Saturday to visit with Little Bit and help us with some projects around the house. Bryan and his dad put in the poles for a clothesline (I love sun dried clothes in the summer) and Bryan's mom re-upholstered my chairs.

Before

After

On Monday we tried cereal for the first time...per the suggestion of our doctor

Please note: These are Bryan's hairy legs, not mine! :)

Cereal did not go so well. So we are definitely taking our time with it. I think she is still a little young.

Have a wonderful Resurrection Weekend Celebration!!!

I Go Out A Walkin'

We had our first walk in the stroller on Thursday!!

The weather has been in the high 50s to low 60s, but the forecast is predicted to get colder and wetter over the weekend. Blah!!! We wanted to get in some sunshine while we could. Thursday was a perfect day.

We met Nathan and his mom Kristine and walked in Nathan's MiMi's neighborhood. Little Bit slept the entire time! I really enjoyed my visit with Kristine. I remember thinking a year ago, I would not have children during the same time as she and I longed to raise our children together. Wow!! How God can completely change your life!!! In so many ways!!!

I neglected to get a picture of Nathan. It just means we will have to do it again soon!

We finished off our Thursday evening with Book Club! Again, no pictures!

On Friday, we met our personal seamstress, Little Bit's Nawna, to make a quick trip to Hancocks to get some material for another new dress Nawna is making. It is great to have her close by to make dresses. I'm hoping she doesn't begin charging labor! We also have a pattern for Gran D to work on.

Then on Friday night, we met Pop and Gran D in Purcell at Rodney's Pizza Place! YUM!!! Little Bit did so great. She was so well behaved and she was awake the entire time!

Pop gave Little Bit her first fishing pole!

It snowed in our area on Saturday and some on Sunday so Little Bit and I stayed in from church. Then Bryan took time on Sunday evening to study for his P.E. exam he takes in April. Little Bit tried to lend a hand!

Someone in this house is quickly getting spoiled!

(note: Bryan normally doesn't dress like this!! :) He kept his shirt from church on and had on comfy pants. We all lounged around)

4 Months Old!!

Another month has come and gone and Little Bit is another month older! I just told Bryan she is nearly half a year old! This time is moving so quickly. She seems to change every day!

At 4 months:

She sleeps sideways in her bed no matter how we lay her.

She loves any toy that hangs from her play mat.

She loves bright lights and goes into a deep stare.

She is cooing some.

She loves to kick her legs. It looks like she is running or riding a bike all while laying on her back!

She loves to ride in the car. Getting in the car seat/carrier isn't so great but once she is moving, she's good-to-go!

She has stayed in the church nursery on 2 Wednesday nights. We haven't left her on Sunday mornings yet.

She smiled one time (it was a non-poop/gas smile:-) when I was make silly laughing noises.

She has beautiful big bright eyes.

She is staying a wake more during the day and loves to play.

On the night before her 4 month birthday she went to bed at 10:30, woke at 2 a.m. to eat, and then slept the rest of the time!!!

Little Bit is beginning to coo and make some adorable noises! I tried to catch some of it on video.

I think she may have had some performance anxiety! You'll just have to bare with me and put up with my high pitched, squeaky voice! It's incredibly embarrassing to hear and I can't believe I'm posting it. But it is for the benefit of Little Bit's family who live out of town. And, I put socks on her everyday. She just keeps kicking them off!

We don't do much to celebrate St. Patrick's day at our house but we had some errands to run before church so we dressed in green. I didn't want Little Bit to get pinched by any of little ones she may have encountered!

Little Bit & I on St. Patrick's Day 2010